I still have to return to this, but this is one of my favourites. I’m so happy to witness your growth and creativity here. Happy for substack for facilitating this connection.
"a little on the nose, even for my subconscious" - I also hate it when my subconscious is painfully trite. Feels like such a missed opportunity. Almost like failure, somehow. "Oh man, I thought I was deep!"
I woke up this morning to read your nightmare and WOW! Mesmerizing! Randomly, I love the quote about Freud and the dog. But more to the point, reading about the world of body, illness and diagnoses, hard hits of love and non-love, cancer and ME/CFS, kept pinging me between heart opening grief and mind-opening spins of resonance. For me chronic fatigue and autoimmune attacks wound together through CPTSD and friends dying of AIDS early in my life so that grief did in fact become the lens for a long time. Didn't feel cheated of the spiritual awakening! More blasted open again and again until normal consciousness with its requisite trips to mild numbness (as I understand it) became unreachable...if it had ever been reachable in the first place. Thank you for the vulnerability. Your writing is stunning.
Thank you so much, your words mean a lot! And isn’t the Deleuze quote delightful? The idea of normal consciousness being unreachable from a place of grief and awakening certainly resonates with me now. There is a feeling of unbridgeability, sometimes, between my experience and the numbed-out normalcy of mainstream culture and the everyday. Thank you for reading ❤️
Seriously, damn! I’m stunned. This might be my favorite writing of yours. I feel like I’ve walked the last 10 years with you in a way more real than our actual friendship. It seems weird to be complimenting this writing, as a matter of fact, because this writing is you and it feels condescending to compliment your “youness,” as if I’m petting you on the head avuncularly and saying, “good job, kiddo.” This is exquisite. Thank you for allowing me to read this.
I still have to return to this, but this is one of my favourites. I’m so happy to witness your growth and creativity here. Happy for substack for facilitating this connection.
Thank you so much, Christa! So happy to be reading your work and in community with you here <3
"a little on the nose, even for my subconscious" - I also hate it when my subconscious is painfully trite. Feels like such a missed opportunity. Almost like failure, somehow. "Oh man, I thought I was deep!"
Jason vast, contain multitudes ❤️
I woke up this morning to read your nightmare and WOW! Mesmerizing! Randomly, I love the quote about Freud and the dog. But more to the point, reading about the world of body, illness and diagnoses, hard hits of love and non-love, cancer and ME/CFS, kept pinging me between heart opening grief and mind-opening spins of resonance. For me chronic fatigue and autoimmune attacks wound together through CPTSD and friends dying of AIDS early in my life so that grief did in fact become the lens for a long time. Didn't feel cheated of the spiritual awakening! More blasted open again and again until normal consciousness with its requisite trips to mild numbness (as I understand it) became unreachable...if it had ever been reachable in the first place. Thank you for the vulnerability. Your writing is stunning.
Thank you so much, your words mean a lot! And isn’t the Deleuze quote delightful? The idea of normal consciousness being unreachable from a place of grief and awakening certainly resonates with me now. There is a feeling of unbridgeability, sometimes, between my experience and the numbed-out normalcy of mainstream culture and the everyday. Thank you for reading ❤️
Seriously, damn! I’m stunned. This might be my favorite writing of yours. I feel like I’ve walked the last 10 years with you in a way more real than our actual friendship. It seems weird to be complimenting this writing, as a matter of fact, because this writing is you and it feels condescending to compliment your “youness,” as if I’m petting you on the head avuncularly and saying, “good job, kiddo.” This is exquisite. Thank you for allowing me to read this.
That means a lot, thank you so much! ❤️❤️❤️ this was a bit vulnerable to put out there, so it’s really lovely to get such beautiful feedback.